Lock Me Up

Someone needs to put me in a cage. I am not recovering from my sinus/cold/allergy problems due to lack of sleep, excess of alcohol and ciggarettes and general stress.
I need to stay in a static position with my hands chained to a keyboard for the next 2 weeks. Fat chance of that happening.
My students impressed me today with their extra credit music/rap videos in Spanish. If you would like to see 2 of the best, let me know. They are amazing! How do undergrads know how to edit videos so well?
Tomorrow night I am going to attempt to 1) stay on the 40 watt stage and off of my ass for the MAC AIDS benefit 2) keep my underwear from wedging it up.

Show Your Support

I'm going to be a body painted burlesque dancer at this Thursday's MAC AIDS benefit. Come on out and show your support for a great cause! (And humiliate me.)

Niblets and Giblets

The smile on my face pictured here is due to the mass consumption of good, southern food that I did over break. I'm sitting in my apt now looking at the almost bare fridge that has fruit, juice and old cheese in it and sighing. I was considering giving up beef before the holiday and then I saw that sugar glazed ham on the buffet table and dove right in.
Here is a belated birthday Hurrah! for Misters Chris Hassiotis and Everett Steele! Huzzah, hurrah, hooray!

Do Me Dirty

Because I am avoiding work and thinking about inappropriate things, I decided to dedicate a blog post to a naughty list of the day.
Here is my famous people and where I'd like to have sex with them list for Tuesday:

1. Gael Garcia Bernal on a beach in Mexico (follame papi)

2. The Roots on their tour bus (gang bang!)
3. Benicio del Toro on a table in the VIP room of a nightclub in LA

4. Adrian Brody on top of a piano

5. James Gandolfini in a dirty hotel

Robin Elizabeth

For my sister, who is the most important person in my life. For her brilliant mind, her beautiful heart, her sharp wit and intuition, her gentle spirit, her endless talent and ability. For her less important yet no less impressive perfect shell- by which others intially recognize her unique beauty. For the friend who lived with me my whole life - growing, laughing, crying, learning, creating, dancing, dreaming together. For the star that shines brighter every day, burning a blaze so subtle and strong at the same time. For the music, the movies, the divorce, the hours of playing pretend, the jokes, the stories, the sweaty summers, the sparse snow, the vacations, the hours of conversation. For my blood and my breath, for my other half. For the one who has loved me unconditionally for who I truly am. For those wide blue eyes that see into my soul. For boobear, for Robin Risbit. I love you, Robin.

Our song: "Such Great Heights"

I am thinking it's a sign that the freckles
In our eyes are mirror images and when
We kiss they're perfectly aligned
And I have to speculate that God himself
Did make us into corresponding shapes like
Puzzle pieces from the clay
And true, it may seem like a stretch, but
Its thoughts like this that catch my troubled
Head when you're away when I am missing you to death
When you are out there on the road for
Several weeks of shows and when you scan
The radio, I hope this song will guide you home

They will see us waving from such great
Heights, 'come down now,' they'll say
But everything looks perfect from far away,
'come down now,' but we'll stay...

I tried my best to leave this all on your
Machine but the persistent beat it sounded
Thin upon listening
And that frankly will not fly. You will hear
The shrillest highs and lowest lows with
The windows down when this is guiding you home
(postal service/iron and wine)

Don't Fuck With the Wookie

SSD seeks WHW between 150 and 300 years old for fun and possible relationship. Stable job with a star fleet a must, aeronautical knowledge a plus. Hoping for spaceship rides, planet hopping and intergalactic excitement. I am fluent in Shyrriiwook and hope to find someone with experience in Galactic Basic. Please no Ewoks. In the case of specie confusion, please reference:
SWSpecies

WHW=wild hairy wookie

SSD=single sexy droid

Ay que loca

I have officially changed my thesis topic to a case study on El trasvesti en la sociedad patriarchal - or the transvestite/drag queen in the patriarchal, latin american society. I'm so excited because my last topic was a bit dry. I was going to connect a Chilean 19th century author with a 20th century Spanish author - but let's just say research wasn't going so well. I was also inspired by the book Sirena Silena that I read for my Latin Lit class. You should read it if you get a chance. :)
Now that I have lost half of those of you reading this, I will say congrats to my friends who finished exams today and good luck to Lauren who is playing at Flicker tonight.
IT'S FRIDAY!!

Oh Henrietta

Tracy and the Plastics - Oh Henrietta. I will pay if you have the lyrics to this song. I can't figure out a few lines and it's killing me. PUREEZ!
I tried to have a discussion about human rights with my students today. Why did I do that? I'm not really sure, except that that is the theme of Chapter 6 and we have to finish it before the final exam. Human rights and the subjunctive. Good luck getting that through to UGA students. I did manage to made fun of frat boys indirectly today, and that felt good.

Child Molester

Stop Being Such a Pussy

Good evening Squirrel Fans. Tonight we bring you a special internet guide from our local sponser, squirrelys.com. We have Sugarbush the model in to give us the scoop. What's the latest internet nut to crack Sugar?
"Well, for those of you who haven't downloaded this onto your computer, you must do so ASAP. World peace depends on it. Guaranteed hours of fun. Or years if you are as easily amused as myself. I'll go ahead and show the link here."Ahnold

Now we take you to a live audio feed from our reporter Stan for the latest update, Stan what is the news from the weekend?
"Well folks, as it turns out Rachel is a terrible bowler. That's right, she scored the lowest in both rounds at Kingpins last night for her friend Gregg's birthday. It's a good thing most of the players were too drunk to notice"Thanks Stan. And that's the news to the minute here at SquirrelWorld. Good night and good fuck.

Saturday Morning

Well it's 3:05 pm and I'm just starting to feel awake today. Last night was the Panty Party at Go Bar hosted by Frau Frau (my good friend Kim Kirby). I thoroughly enjoyed the festivities and met some new foreign grad students which is always fun. We stopped by a party later in the evening and I hit the bed about 4 am or so. WHEW!
Tonight it's round 2 at Krush Girlz - yes I know most of you readers are so "over it" but I a dancer and can't resist. I would like to shoot my neighbors who partied till 6 am and restarted the festivities at 11 am in honor of the Dawgs. Some girl keeps shrieking "Go Dawgs" and I can vaguely see a football flying outside my window. Oh well, that's what you get for living in Athens I suppose.
Also, my ex-boyfriend has my camera, so I may not be posting photos for a while.

Flying Froggies

This is an interesting article on levitation involving frogs. I'm not saying that I totally understand it...
Ribbit
Today it is absolutely gorgeous outside, my definition of perfect weather. I am in disbelief that it is November - yet very pleased not to be freezing my ass off and chugging cough syrup. School is so enjoyable when it's nice out and the leaves are falling on north campus. The ending of this semester is making me realize that I need to make plans for next year at some point, as I am nearly 3/4 done with grad school. Where will I be this time next year? Who knows.
PS If your teacher quickly runs to the front of the room to write something on the bored, it is possible that he/she farted

Potty Time!

I wish I had a toilet that played music during my daily visits. For instance, a good healthy poo would be sountracked by "You Dropped the Bomb on Me" by The Gap Band. Or maybe BJ Thomas "Raindrops are Falling on my Head" for those mid afternoon golden showers. I also want lights and lasers to accompany the score.
In other news, I am a walking advertisement for Depeche Mode today, right down to my underwear. My ass reads "pain and suffering". David Gahan, you own my crotch.

here's an article about potties that I found interesting:
lieunews

ZOOMER

Today I can't stop listening to Schneider TMs album Zoomer. It's an old favorite introduced to me by the illustrious Mr. Chad Burge, and never seems to get stale.
So German and sexy groove vibe!

And I thank you. . .

Dear David Gahan,
You may not know me, but I am totally hot for you. I saw you at the Gwinnett Center this weekend and was blown away by your performance. You deserved all 3 encores, and I must say that even though you're in your 40s, you dance, sing and writhe like a horny 25 year old. I just can't get enough!
Sincerely,
the spazz in section 116

Sniffles

I think I'm highly allergic to ragweed. Highly.